(I originally wrote this as one post, but it ended up so long I thought I’d do it in two or three instalments. The beauty of this is that I’m now sorted for the next few weeks slap-bet wise! )
The other day I was reading through a random magazine that happened to be sitting on the kitchen table during breakfast when I came across an article on the stereotypical types of girls in London Sixth Form schools, written by one of those people who have awarded themselves the title of comedian, and yet aren’t actually funny enough to do anything other than dodgy articles in a random magazine. However, it got me thinking about how my school works, so I thought I’d give it a shot at creating the types of lads you get in Sixth Form, hopefully in a vaguely amusing way.
So, here it is; the Ultimate Guide to Sixth Form Lads *
NB: It is important to note that the task I have undertaken is effectively impossible. Not that many people fit in perfectly to one of these categories, and chances are you’re a combination of 2 or more different types of lad. These are the extreme stereotypes, so don’t expect to find yourself, maybe just bits of yourself.
(* Many Sixth Form boys prefer to be referred to as lads, since it makes us feel older, cooler and far more manly.)
The Nerds
Probably the easiest group to recognise, though not due to the stereotypical Einstein hairdo and broken glasses with tape in the middle that almost every bad teen-flick seems to think defines a nerd. No, these are the people who don’t have to worry about learning the phrase “would you like fries with that?” Basically, the people who give a crap about school. For one reason or another, whether it’s because they want to do well, want to be rich or don’t want to waste their time (or at a private school, their parent’s money), these people try in school (usually successfully). They are easily identified by good grades, teachers often loving them and, in some rare cases, a severe lack of a social life (though again, not as many as in crappy films).
The Boffs (aka Boffins)
A more subtle group, the boffs fulfil all, or at least most of the requirements of a Nerd, but with a few distinct differences. For starters, they are usually good at a few sports, and in sporting teams. Also, they may be ‘popular’ (though this is harder to define than it was in year 8; is it the people with the most friends? The ones everyone wants to be friends with? Do these people even exist anymore?), and will have a reasonable or busy social life. Still, they work hard and are generally fairly good all round.
They can range from very good in school to fairly good, and the same in sport. If you know one of those incredibly annoying guys, also known as ‘Golden Boys’, who seems to be perfect at everything, chances are he’s a boff (you know the type; straight A’s, in all the sports teams, maybe even captain of a few, friendly... oh yeh, and secretly resented by most people for being smart and sporty, and often popular too. It’s just not fair!).
The Mecks
Here’s one only Jewish guys will probably have heard of, so for those of you who don’t know, a meck is a male beck. Becks are the (usually Jewish) girls who wear abercrombie and fitch religiously (or, if they’re really crazy, Hollister), worship BBM and spend their whole lives typing on their blackberries, despite the fact that often they are surrounded by people or even in a conversation; anyone on BBM is automatically more important and interesting. Mecks are the male version of Becks, but much more rare. They’re pretty similar to be honest; they wear Abercrombie or Hollister, spend all their time on their blackberries (which apparently are called BB for short, for anyone who has a good phone and didn’t know that) and mostly hang out with just becks. They usually don’t have many male friends, and often come across as a bit camp (or very camp, it depends). Occasionally they can even be aggressive to other guys, but in reality they are full of it most of the time and throw out idle threats as often as they PING people on BBM.
That’s all for now, next week I’ll post part 2 of the guide, which is arguably even better than this week’s post (if that’s even possible!).
Have a great (and anticipation-filled) week!
-Jamie
